Winners Round 2 !! Certificate Winners

Shortlist for Made Me Laugh:

WINNER: @The_No_Show: The winter of my discontent. (A shoo-in, really.)

@toddadamson: Midget strudel. (This guess can be interpreted in so many ways, but I choose not to consider the gruesome one. I did laugh when I saw it!)

@lancehenrikson [second guess] : OK, one more guess - The Mao Tse Tung compendium of games (This is a fantastic guess, not tagged properly (I almost misssed it), but very awesome. I had to go with @The_No_Show because it made me laugh and really resonated with what is in the box.)

Shortlist for Best Otherwise Inaccurate Guess:

WINNER @michael_elliott: umm...a music box. with a tiger on it. (As soon as I read this guess, I wished that I had a music box with a tiger on it.)

@electroginge: something green (There is something green ON the object, but the object itself is not green, nor is it even remotely ecologically responsible.)

@thewesterly: it's a hard drive! (The object in the box is totally not a hard drive, but I like your enthusiasm, @thewesterly!)

@Tony_D: We document the things that are important, else we otherwise forget. (Yes, this object evokes a sense of important moments likely forgotten, but I can’t make a stronger argument than that.)

@AndrewGent: I know! Ernest Hemingway's hunting jacket. Complete with leather elbow patches. (I was tempted by this one, just for the detail and enthusiasm, but it’s the wrong social scene entirely.)

@cawcaw: In the box is something to replace a missing part of anatomy: a glass eye, false teeth. (I suppose that abuse of this item could lead to missing eyes or teeth, but it would not work particularly well as a replacement. I find it hard to imagine what one could replace with this object)

@andreakremer: a Lite-Brite [tm] or similar creative box-shaped toy. (Oh, this is not a toy at all! The best argument I could make would involve “getting lit” but this is not for children, and for legal reasons I am obliged to emphasize that.)

@arnied: Solid, not shifting, no noise, an even distribution of weight. It's a foundation, something to build on. (Using the same strategy that won the last round works for Rock Scissors Paper, but not necessarily for GWIITB!)

Shortlist for What Some Might Think Is Closest to What Is in the Box - Literal

WINNER: @KT30003k: I think it's a heavy glass cutting board, with whimsical kitchen designs decorating its surface. (This is darn close – translucent kitchen ware with appropriate decorations!)

@trelvix: something that could cause death by choking or suffocation in the hands of the right Republican. (While the first part of this statement is technically true (could cause death by choking or suffocation), I fail to see what would make the right hands and what political affiliation would have to do with it. It is not good to go around killing people, and I wouldn’t want a prize that was likely to be so dangerous.)

Shortlist for What Some Might Think Is Closest to What Is in the Box - Metaphorical

WINNER: @fistsoffolly: An idea whose time has come. (Clearly to all who see this, it is an idea whose time came at some point perhaps in the mid 1980’s but has never really left. So, not the Grand Prize winner, because it is an idea of long standing, but an evergreen idea of continuing relevance.)

@LidMo: Lingering regret. (This object could lead to lingering regret, or could become symbolic of lingering regret, but I am not able to judge it a winner on such circumstancial arguments.)

@d_g_: A bell that tolls for a lost era. (As discussed above, this is an idea of long standing, but its era is by no means lost. It is self renewing and lives every day around the world without any need for mournful remembrance.)

I had to make a new separate category for these three guesses, all of which I loved and all of which made me laugh. After a good deal of contemplation, I concluded that they made me laugh because I knew what was in the box. Given such powerful potential associations with alcohol in these guesses, eventually I concluded they must be treated separately – not as literally closest to what is in the box, but with recognition for the strength of their resonance with what the object is used for.